After being diagnosed and treated for breast cancer I suppose it takes time to be able to relax. Nine long months have come and gone since the day I discovered that scary lump in my breast. Now in this stage of the game I have been busy with all the doctors that have been involved in my journey to get me cancer free. It’s been the time that I have looked forward to after a long road and it’s been nice to have my little reunions. I’ve heard lots of congratulations’ and definitely more comments on my new hair than I can count.
Last week I saw my surgeon for my final follow up appointment and he asked me to have a mammogram and an ultra sound so he would have on file what he called a baseline. He explained that this would be a good thing to have so that in the future we could compare any other suspicious findings and know if there had been any changes to them. In the beginning of my treatment a breast MRI had shown two small places that had caused him concern in addition to the tumor that we knew was cancer. He had actually asked the center to do biopsies on them but they assured him they were nothing but tiny cyst. When he performed my original lumpectomy he actually removed one of them because it was so close the cancerous tumor and it was just as they said absolutely nothing.
Yesterday I attended my palliates session and then made my way to Tacoma to my scheduled appointment at the Breast Center. Mammograms are never fun, some of you will agree but they are really not fun when you have a boob that has been through two surgeries and all that radiation, ouch! Next was the ultra sound and half way through this test the technician left to go fetch the radiologist that could read what she was seeing. What now! She explained that she thought it was the same little spot that was seen months ago, when I was told it was just a cyst but she would like to do a biopsy on it anyway? I made the appointment for the procedure to be done next week and was on my way home.
As I started down the freeway I said a little prayer and asked God to be my co pilot, my mind was all over the place. Then the what if’s started to take over. What if we had just done those biopsies in the beginning? What if the surgeon had just removed that cyst at the same time as my original surgery? What if it is cancer? What if I have to do all this treatment again? By the time I arrived at home I had come to the conclusion that I would call my surgeon and just ask him to remove the lump, I decided that I would not let this spot that is now in my left breast haunt me another day.
Now as I wait for a call from the surgeon I give this all to God, all the worries and negative thoughts, I will pray away and if you would remember to say a little prayer in my behalf I’m sure this will all be over soon.
I will keep you posted!
